Not too Comfortable Last Night and Today…

Errrrrr. That’s how it seemed last night. My landlady was leaving today for a long trip and I was taking her to the airport early (hey, 7:15 AM is early for me), and I was posting, posting, posting, until late. Went to bed at about 1:30 AM.

As soon as I closed my eyes, though, I saw thousands of pinpoints of lights…red lights. Never have I seen this before. Sparkling, and moving all around the lower half of my closed-eye vision sphere. That last for a few minutes. But when I lay down on my side and tried to go off to sleep, I could not sleep. And I was going to get up at 6. So I just got up, went back to bed, got up, went back to bed, who knows how many times. Maybe it was about 3 AM finally got there. But all of a sudden, my landlady knocked on my door, and said, “Kau’ila… It’s 7 o’clock… time to go”.

I got up quick, but my body had been in a sweat last night, my bed was wet, I was groggy, and not quite there. But put her things in the car and off we went, on the 45 minute drive to the airport. Fortunately we arrived in plenty of time, and early enough for a post airport drive mocha at Java on the Rock. It was maybe another two hours before I felt present enough to think.

So what has been going on? I don’t know exactly. But last night I felt strongly we were on the verge of a great change, on many levels. And that is why I could not sleep.

Something “big” or “shocking” or “awe-inspiring” or “awe-some” is happening. On many levels. There is much of which we are not consciously aware. We sense it. This change is something that encompasses several “levels”, including what we might call the “outer” level. In other words, where we now “feel” it inside, we will later see it, hear about it, maybe even taste it and smell it. It is still outwardly “hidden” from us so that every detail which needs attending to, may be attended to, without interference. No dates, no intel, no hints. Just that inner sense of that great change coming.

Right now I feel like I am losing something. I feel like something is being removed. And part of me feels sad. Part of me wants to “fix” it. And part of me wants to cry for what it is losing.

Figure that one out.